


Funny How It Rained All Day

by safetypin



Series: Saturday Night Love [1]
Category: Late Night Host RPF, Saturday Night Live, Saturday Night Live RPF
Genre: AU: Not married, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-17 23:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5889427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/safetypin/pseuds/safetypin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He had never been important, until he worked to be. He dreaded love, so he ran from it. He ran until he couldn't anymore, and so he turned back. </p><p>Bill Hader never meant to fall in love with Seth Meyers, but he did plan on showing up unannounced at 30 Rockefeller Plaza one long, interesting night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Funny How It Rained All Day

**Author's Note:**

> I mostly wrote this while half asleep, so all errors are mine.  
> First time writing SNL stories, and I hope this prompts some others to write more as well!

Bill Hader never saw himself as much more than movie nerd that got lucky thanks to someone else’s connections. Once upon a time, that is. He had come a long way since his days of wearing strange wigs while pretending to host a talk show and covering his mouth so that he wouldn’t giggle while obnoxiously flirting on screen in a sketch. Now he had a name for himself, one that didn’t apply to a character on live television. He was really, truly, proud of himself now.

He had also come a long way from having nervous break-downs and panic attacks in the middle of a joke. From not sleeping or eating before a performance and falling into Seth Meyers’ arms when his body finally had enough of his actions and he collapsed unaware. A long way from the first time he sat down and thought, “Okay, think. What am I doing with my life? How is this what I want?” 

But what Bill wasn’t far past was all the running away he had done. He had run away from SNL when he left. He knew it too, and so had the one he was running away from. And that wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair because Bill had run from love. From the one he was in love with, at that. 

Bill had cited wanting to pursue a more movie-centered type of career when he left SNL. But the aforementioned love-interest had been a far more present reason in actuality. Falling in love with one’s best friend is not a small deal, or a smart business move. So to avoid confrontation with the growing mutual attraction between himself and none other than Seth Meyers, Bill had left his friends behind and ran once more.

So maybe it was because of his fourth time sitting in a car at midnight and going “Okay, think.” to himself that he was here. Why he was slipping through the backdoor of 30 Rockefeller Center with a key he shouldn’t still have. Why his palms were sweating as he took out another key that he shouldn’t have but needed to make his way up a locked stairwell that ran through the back of the building. 

The result of this particular “Okay, think.” sesion was Bill standing at the 14th floor platform of a restricted stairwell. At 30 Rock. Staring at the cast members, writers, and crew of Saturday Night Live exiting the writing room. 

“Oh shit.” Bill exhaled as he observed Colin Jost and the one and only Seth Meyers exit the room. Bill could hear the writer-turned-Update anchor thanking the talk show host for the apparent advice he’d given. 

Bill was frozen as he saw Colin return to his office, Seth watching the door close. But once the office door closed, Bill, still behind the stairwell door, dashed back down the stairs as Seth unlocked the door from the 14th floor exit. Trusting his gut instinct with its guess about where the Late Night host would be going, Bill hit the 13th floor running. 

***

Seth entered the dark studio 8A quietly, making sure the door didn’t slam behind him. Nobody ever used the abandoned studio after the NBC had finished using it’s twin, 8B, for the 2010 midterms, so Seth finding himself in the dark room was no rarity. He had begun hiding in the old abandoned men’s changing room back when he was on SNL, when his head writer duties stressed him out too much and he just needed somewhere to hide. The abandoned dark of 8A had continued to be a safe haven even into his time as Late Night host. 

Knowing the twists and turns of the studio even in the dark, Seth made his way back to the old dressing rooms where he had set up camp almost five years ago. In the dressing room behind the studio’s now creaking stage and cobweb-covered seats, Seth had long ago made himself a makeshift office in the left behind makeup tables. 

Seth flicked the light on, forever surprised that the NBC would waste funding on electricity for the unused studio. He set the papers he had been carrying on the table he used as a desk when occupying the space. Sliding out the chair he found, Seth sat and began to mill through the paperwork and script edits he’d forever be seeing. At least, that was how it felt to him at the rate his life was going. 

As minutes passed by with Seth never glancing up from his papers, it was easy for him to not notice how the shadows of the secondary hallway connecting to the room were less empty than usual. 

The time must have been twenty minutes past Seth’s initial retiring to the usually vacant old room when he heard the footsteps. At first he figured it must have either been Colin or Jimmy coming to visit him, the two of them being some of the few people knew he hid there. But as the seconds passed, Seth realized the footsteps were growing fainter, not stronger. Whomever was in the studio’s backstage with him was leaving, exiting to the restricted stairs. 

“Come on.” Seth sighed, pushing the papers aside. 

Being responsive is how comedy works, and Seth’s job was bringing that to life. Comedy was his life. So doing what he did best, Seth shot from the chair and followed the footsteps up the stairs, the door not even closed yet when he reached it. From above him he heard more doors slam and Seth knew whomever he had chosen to chase had gone running onto the tenth floor. Not one to give up on a pursuit of curiosity, Seth did too. 

It was past time when most staff had gone home for the night as Seth made his way through the halls of 30 Rock’s tenth floor. All was quiet, and even the footsteps couldn’t be heard. Still Seth wandered, mind set on finding whomever it was that had found him only to run from him. Though as he thought back on it, Seth couldn’t recall hearing and footsteps other than those that had been retreating. 

After minutes of seeing nothing out of the ordinary, Seth was ready to give in for the night, go back to collect his papers, and go home. But as he rounded one last hallway corner, Seth finally came upon something strange. At the end of a dead end hall devoid of offices and usually people, a dark silhouette was illuminated by the cityscape shining through at them from the window at it’s end. Yes, the mystery silhouette was indeed quite strange.

***

As Bill heard Seth’s footsteps round the corner, he didn’t turn around. He knew he shouldn’t have run from Seth while in 8A, but he hadn’t been able to win that battle with his flight urge. As he continued to stare out the window, he continued to fight with that urge.

“Look, I’m not sure who you are yet, but would you mind turning around and-”

“I’m sorry.” Bill didn’t bother to hear Seth’s monologue, he knew why he was here and what it was that meant he had to do. 

Seth’s steps towards the man at the window faltered, the voice that cut him off resonating in his memory. He knew he recognized it, but he couldn’t put the name to the voice. 

“What?” The talk show host sputtered, footsteps finally speeding up as he walk the final lengths of the hallway. 

“I said I’m sorry, Seth.” It hit him. Bill Hader. It was Bill who was standing in front of him at the window. Bill who had run away from SNL, the NBC, and most of all, run away from Seth. 

Seth kept walking until he finally stood next to the man he hadn’t seen since his being a guest on Seth’s own show and an SNL season finale. Both were silent, staring out at the city skyline.

“I shouldn’t have gone the way I did. I should have given us the time to talk. Every time.” Bill broke the silence, voicing only what they both knew about the last times they had seen one another. 

“Why are you here, Bill?” Seth knew he’d have to ask at some point, and thought it better to get it over with. 

“I figured it was time I stopped being a coward and gave us that time to talk.” Bill shrugged, hands still buried in the pockets of his dark blue jeans. Seth kept silent, looking up to observe the other man’s facial expression, but Bill kept his eyes downcast to the roaring city below. 

“There was a night, a long time ago, -- it was practically another lifetime ago now really, -- where you told me you loved me.” Seth froze at the reminder of the words he had only said aloud once, but had repeated in his head too many a time since. Bill had never said anything, so Seth had just assumed the other man hadn’t heard him say it. 

“It was the same night I had a panic attack while we were live. Lorne had just left after telling me I belonged here, and you were helping me pick up the pieces. Then when you were leaving me in the dressing room to go back on set for Update, you whispered it. 

"You never brought it up again, so I figured you didn’t know I’d heard and I said nothing. I wish I had though. I wish it hadn’t taken me this long.” Bill choked the final words out, eyes pressed shut ever so tightly. 

Seth breathed in then out, not sure of what it was that Bill meant by his words. Nothing seemed stable anymore, it was like 3/5ths of his life had been uprooted. 

“Just what do you mean, when you say that?” Seth finally stuttered a moment later, voice trembling. 

“I should have told you I heard you. Should have told you I’ve loved you since the first time you laughed at a joke I made.” Seth had no words. Bill had showed up 30 Rock for the first time in forever, made Seth chase him up stairs and around the tenth floor, confused Seth entirely, and then professed his love for the Late Night host. Said host couldn’t help but feel that this situation was more than a little unfair to him. Anger began to bubble up inside him. 

“What the fuck!” Seth ignored Bill’s obvious flinch at his outburst.

“This is not okay! This is not fair. You can’t just show up here after years of alienating me, scare the crap out me, make me chase you around, and then dump that on me!

"I can’t believe you Bill, why the hell would you think that now, years after I said one mistaken sentence, was the appropriate time to come dump your emotional… whatever- on me? How the hell am I supposed to react to this?” Seth let go of trying to hold back his frustration. For years he had resigned himself to just being friends with this man, hidden any sign of anything deeper, and than this. Bill had horrible planning skills to be sure.

“I’m sorry, okay? I’m not good at this-” Bill tried to block out Seth’s bitter laugh of a response to his words.

“I didn’t mean to cause a scene downstairs, that was an accident. But honestly, of every mistake I’ve ever made, not speaking up takes the cake. So I’m taking that initiative here and asking you the goddamn question I came here to ask before I freaked out and started running through this place like a headless chicken.” He stopped monologuing for a moment, taking a deep breath before turning to Seth, ready for continuing. Seth felt a twisting sensation in the pit of his gut as he guessed what was to come. 

“Do you still love me Seth Meyers?” Those words, simple as could be, broke every wall Seth had ever put up for himself. It was a moment in which he could no longer deny all those years of loneliness, and all those years of asking “what if?”

“I…” Seth choked out, eyes darting everywhere but in Bill’s direction as the other focused his eyes on Seth’s. He cleared his throat, made up his mind.

“I have to go.” And with those four little words, Seth walked away.

***

Bill didn’t really know how long he had been standing there since Seth had left. It was only once he heard a meek voice chirp at him from behind that he turned from the window.

“Sir? Are you alright?” He turned to find a small young woman standing behind him, clutching at a janitor’s bucket.

“Oh, yes. Yes, I’m just fine.” It took him a moment, but Bill began to stride towards the girl at the other end of the hall.

“You, uh, you’re Bill Hader, yeah?” She marveled, left hand wiping at the dark material of her jeans. 

“That I am. And you are?” Bill asked the stranger with a rag tucked in her back pocket, the one gripping a mop by the handle.

“I’m nobody!” She explained ever so quickly, reminding Bill of characters he’d played before. 

“No one is nobody.” Bill argued, moving towards the mystery person he assumed to be the janitor. 

“Thank you, but really, if you ask anyone in this building who I am, no one will know.” The girl shrugged, and Bill stilled his feet a few yards before her.

But before either could move forward, the chime of an elevator was audible in the distance. Bill’s head turned towards the sound immediately, not an abnormal reaction.

When he turned back to react to the self-doubting stranger, the small mop-holding girl was gone. But as he heard the new set of rapidly approaching footsteps from the way of the elevator, Bill put her from his mind.

***

Seth had made his way back to 8A to collect his papers without seeing another person, for which he was ever so thankful. Yet as he stood in the dust filled space, he came to a new conclusion. One that challenged himself in a way his ‘think outside the box’ mentality should have been proud of.

He still loved Bill. And now that he had run, Seth was no better than the man he loved himself. Once again abandoning his papers to the dusty desk, he left 8A. Seth made his way to the elevator in hallway outside, and dutifully pressed numbers one and zero, hoping that the man he had waited so long for might have waited a bit longer for him. 

***

Pushing away his curiosity over who the depressingly low-esteemed, disappearing janitor was, Bill turned his feet in the direction of the elevators, unsure of what to expect. 

Perhaps it was security, coming to kick him out. Maybe it was someone whose office resided on the very floor he stood. Or, a little voice in his head that sounded suspiciously like Stefon, murmured, maybe it was Seth. But why would he come back, Bill argued internally. Maybe because Seth loved him as well. But that seemed far fetched. 

And yet as the footsteps drew nearer, Bill grew more nervous, and the emotions that flooded his body reminded Bill of the anxiety he’d suffered when he’d first begun on SNL. He hadn’t felt that way since the night that Lorne told him he always had a place on SNL, the night that Seth’s retreating form had whispered, “I love you Bill Hader.” 

Bill just wanted to be able to finally say, “I love you too, Seth Meyers.”

***

Seth stepped from the elevator the moment the doors slid open. Feeling both bold and determined to finish what he had started years ago, Seth made his way down the hall. His footsteps faltered only as he reached the corner of the hallway where he assumed Bill was still standing. 

And just as he’d thought, Bill was just beyond the corner. The broad shouldered man stood there, eyes staring right back at Seth the moment he entered the hallway. 

“Wha-” Seth held up a hand, silencing Bill before he got any further than his first word. 

“I made a mistake, running out of here.” The Late Night host sighed, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck. He returned his hands to his jean pockets, inhaling deeply as Bill looked to him with watery eyes.

“I need to answer that question, because it’s only fair to both of us that I do. I don’t want to keep living the way we have been.” Seth smiled sadly, stepping forward and taking Bill’s hands into his own.

“I love you Bill Hader.”

Bill choked on a sob after the words were said. He threw his arms around the other, burying his face in Seth’s neck.

“I love you too, Seth Meyers.” He breathed.

Lifting his head up, Bill looked straight into Seth’s eyes.

“I love you too. I’ve always wanted to say that. I love you too. I love you too.” Bill laughed, Seth smiling with him. 

Arms wrapped around one another, they each leaned in and pressed their lips gently together. It was without fireworks, but still heart melting.

***

They left the building together, hand in hand. They walked to Seth’s official office and his make-shift one to collect his papers as they smiled and brought each other up to date on their lives. The two had nearly left the building when a question popped into Bill’s head.

“Seth, do you know anything about the janitor on the tenth floor of the building?” He asked, mindful of his new partner’s confusion over the question.

“No. Why, is that person important or something?” Seth asked.

“No, no. I was just wondering is all.”

***

A month had past since the night on the tenth floor. Bill and Seth were happy together, still in their phase of honeymooning. Neither had made any move to tell anyone of their recent romantic revelation, but had an idea to let the public into their little secret. 

Since Bill had moved back to New York City to live with Seth, they had discussed many a way they could out themselves. Their favorite included incorporating the well loved character of Stefon into an episode of Late Night. From there, all would be revealed. 

So there they were, on a regular Tuesday night, both men readying themselves for their performances. Seth was ready in his usual suit, and Bill dressed in the god-awful, ever so distasteful costume of the city correspondent. From wig to boots, he was Stefon to the core. 

***

“Thank you to Panic! At the Disco for performing their new song, Crazy=Genius! We’ll be right back after this break.” Seth yelled as the show cut to commercial. He glanced to the wings, eyes searching for Bill’s crazily dressed form. 

The man Seth was looking for was watching him right back. Bill was being fit with his mic as he and Seth locked eyes, the former biting his lip and smiling as they did. Their plan was about five minutes away from going into action, and it was madness. The plan was madness- not the studio. Yet so much was still to come. 

The break flew by for Seth. By the time he’d stopped looking at Bill, spacing out, arranging his papers, and straightening his tie, the crew was counting down the seconds to their being live. The applause were loud, the lights bright, and Seth knew there was no going back. But he couldn’t’ve been happier for that.

“Thank you, thank you. So, as you all know, it’s springtime here in New York and many a person will be flocking to the city in hopes of new experiences and photographs. Here to tell us about some of what the city has to offer, is our city correspondent and my husband, Stefon!” As Seth shouted over the screaming audience, Bill waltzed over to a guest's chair, actually waltzing.

“Hello hubby.” Bill was practically leering at Seth, already draped over the chair. 

“Hi love. So tell me, have you found any good clubs lately?” Seth smiled, he had missed doing these hilarious segments with Bill.

“Well… New York’s hottest club is ‘SHUT THE F**K UP DUDE!’” Bill’s voice was high and squeaking, his hands flying to cover his smile the minute the words were said.

“Really? Well, what’s so great about it then, honey?” Seth asked, lips tight to hold in his laughter, hands clasped on the desk. 

“This club has everything! Vodka aunts, hipster hats, those little packets of ketchup. Oh, and exploding hands!” He gushed.

“Stefon sweetie, I’m sorry to ask but uh, what is an exploding hand?”

“It’s that thing, where a pyromaniac really likes Green Day, and so they use tanks to blow their hands off. And-” 

“Moving on then.” Seth interrupted. This was the moment they had been waiting for, what their plan came down to.

“So in all seriousness,” Bill said, normal voiced while ripping off the fake hair covering his eye.

“There is an announcement I am here to make.” He moved to stand behind Seth, placing his hands on the host’s shoulders.

“This amazing Mr. Bill Hader standing here behind me, and I, have some news to share.” Both men were smiling.

“We’re getting married!” Bill screamed.

The audience went up-in-arms, celebrating.

And as the final credits rolled for all watching at home, neither cast or crew noticed the girl standing off in the corner of the wings off the stage. No one saw her slip away into the shadows of a big blue police box, or fade into another timeline. 

The End.

**Author's Note:**

> Titular credits to All Time Low's song Remembering Sunday.  
> Please comment your thoughts!


End file.
